I am a firm believer that cookie consumption is directly correlated with happiness. As such, I have had cookies all over the United States (and the world, but nothing’s impressed me internationally), and consider myself an expert. This list is a public service, so that no one will ever waste precious calories on a mediocre cookie.

The greatest cookies in America are as follows:

1. Fudge Brownie Chip – Cafe Solterra – Jekyll Island Club Hotel – Glynn County, Georgia
2. Chocolate Chip – Levain Bakery – New York, New York
3. Sea Salt Chocolate Chip – M Street Kitchen – Santa Monica, California
3. Double Chocolate Chip – Meeting Street Cafe – Providence, Rhode Island
4. Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip – Woodstar Cafe – Hadley, Massachusetts
5. Chocolate Chip – Mary’s Mountain Cookies – Breckenridge, Colorado
6. Cowboy Cookie – Handlebar Coffee – Santa Barbara, California
7. Chocolate Chip – Milk Jar – California
8. Chocolate Chip – Kumquat Mae Café – Watkinsville, Georgia
9. Chocolate Truffle – Alcove, Los Feliz, California
10. Chocolate Chip – Mama’s Kitchen – Palomar, California

I do accept submissions via mail. For consideration on the list, it must be from a bakery and available to consumers. That’s not to say I won’t appreciate it if you send me a batch that you made yourself. Use the contact link to find out where I am. If I test positive from your cookie, I will hunt you down and kill you.